Memories of Spencer

September 28, 2014



this is Mimi here....

.....thinking of you today Spencer.....wondering what you would be doing, if you were still on eart ,where we are. We are confined to only seeing what is happening here....Are you confined to only what is happening where you are... or .... are you capable of knowing what we are doing here? You may already know this but..... you remember that I use to see a lone white dove, after Popeye passed over and 6 months before you left? I would see it and it would always lite on the ground in front of me, turn around ...look at me for a minute and then fly off. There was always only one. It would happen on a regular basis and it was always a comfort to me and I knew there was life beyond what I could see or touch. Wes has seen him and one day your Aunt Val and Uncle Ken saw him. I haven't see him for several months and one day there were 3 white doves who flew over and dipped down but never touched the ground. I tried to find them but couldn't. It was puzzling me...because I didn't know why there were 3 in place of the usual one. It was several days later and I tho't Oh I know...one is for Spencer, one is for Shelby and the other one is for Richard. Both of your grandpas are there with you now. Somehow I just never tho't about it that way, until then. I'm glad they are there with you, but we sure miss you all down here. Death of your physical bodies, can not separate us from each other tho....you all live on with us, even tho we can't see or touch you.....you are very much alive with us....you are a part of us forever ....you are in our heads and in our hearts....and we can't wait til we see you again. For now...I'll be thankful that you were ready when your number came up. Remember a few hours before you left and you told everyone you were number 100, in line? haha That is still funny to us! I'm sure we have a number too...we just don't know what it is yet. If we don't get our number soon....talk later.

Love you Spencer!


Mimi

August 13, 2014



Wow, how the time flies. You've been gone 7 yrs and I still see you in more ways than one. I see you in blue eyes when I look at people yet your eyes are the bluest. Your quietness and dry sense of humor has come to my mind more This year than in the past. Funny how you remember these things at different times. I remember how your were the person on crutches and yet you were the one who opened the doors for others. And on your make a wish trip how we had to run to keep up with you. You were so amazing ! You will forever live in my heart. I love you to the moon and back.

Love you,


Nannie Taylor

August 13, 2013



It's been 6 years today that you left us and I still miss you. What a special young man you were to all who knew you. I know that you must be enjoying your Pappaw Taylor now in heaven with you. I can see you that day in November when you met him at those Golden Gates and all the things the two of you had to say to one another.

Aunt Stef and I and Uncle Jamie and the little boys went to eat at Shoguns here in Richmond in celebrating your life. I remember the look on your face when they set he grill on fire and you never flinched. I saw that in Taylor's little blue eyes as well as he exclaimed, Wow! You are and always will be my special Angel.

Love you,


Nannie Taylor







September 28, 2011



Hey Spencer...yes, it's been a very long time since I've left a memory on here but since today you would have been 20...oh my gosh... I can't be old enough to have a child that would be 20! I can't help but think about all the birthday's when you were growing up...do you remember how dad used to always take you and Zachary to McDonald's while I set up the party at home? Balloons, cake, presents, treat bags...and then when you came home...surprise!! The funniest part was when you both started asking when it was time to leave for McDonald's so I could set everything up! Today, I look back on those days...thank you for allowing me to keep with my "tradition" and playing along, that was very sweet of you and Zachary! Dad told a joke when we went to Shoguns tonight...he said "how many moms (meaning me) does it take to change a light bulb?" Are you ready..."One. She holds the light bulb while the world revolves around her". Yes, I can hear you laugh!


Love you Spencer.


Mom




September 28, 2011



September 28, 2011, makes it your birthday! You would be 20 years old today. Wow, that is hard to realize. It was just the other day that Papaw and I were talking about you and this age. I ask him if he'd ever thought what you would be doing at this time in your life? He without hesitation said, "He would be in college." I have no doubt of that. We always knew how intelligent you were.

We went to your favorite place to eat tonight in honor of your birthday. I can still see you the first time we took you to Shogun's, sitting in that high chair and the look in your eyes when the chef lit the fire on the grill. It was those beautiful blue eyes that I remember so vividly. They are with us always. Happy birthday Sweetheart. We love you so much.


Nannie and Papaw Taylor





August 13, 2011



I wasn't going to say anything but..".We still miss you Spencer! It's been 4 years now since you lost the battle to Cancer but it's not because you didn't put up a good fight. I don't think I could have been as brave as you were. You left this world very peacefully and we know where you are and we wouldn't take that from you and ask you to come back. I wonder one thing...will you be 15 forever? That's really not fair if you get to be 15 and I have to be 70 something when we meet again. ha ...probably won't be that way.. I'm just thinking with an earthly mind....it's all I 'got' right now. TTYL Spenc!"


Love you, Mimi


PS... Fly Spencer Fly....We know you are!





August 12, 2011



Tomorrow on Saturday, August 13th it marks the 4th year of your passing. I am reminded on that day that Papaw and I were driving home from Houston, Tx, after visiting your Aunt Stephanie and friends when I got the call from the social worker that you were in your last hour of life.

For the past 5 months I have been living in Houston at Stephanie and James home while they were in Washington due to the twins coming 3 months early.

Again on this day, I will be travelling back home to Midland, Tx. from Houston.

I am still reminded of those beautiful blue eyes that melted my heart every time I looked at you.

Every time we see the full moon we are reminded of when we had gone to eat that night with Frank and MaryAnn and you were with us and as we turned in the alley heading to the garage you said, "Oh Look Papaw, It's a big old full moon."

You are still in our thoughts and prayers EVERY SINGLE DAY. You will never be forgotten as you brought so much joy and love to all of us.

With all our love Sweetheart!


Nannie and Papaw Taylor





September 28, 2010



A Hallmark memory of Spencer who would have been 19 on this day.

"When You Fly"

When you walk... God will guide you.
When you run... God will sustain you. And when you fly... Yes, when you fly... God will take you places you never dreamed. Have a ...wonder-filled birthday.
Wish we could see what you see and fly with you, Spencer.

Love you forever, Mimi





August 26, 2010



This came from Harry, one of Spencers best friends. He just graduated from McKinney Boyd and is headed to Berkley. On the last day before he left for California he and Justin, (Spencer's other best friend), met at the cemetery at Spencer's gravesite. On the photo below is what Harry gave Justin to bring to us. This was apparently a project that the class Spencer and Harry were in did at Dowell Middle School we think during 7th grade. Somehow when the writings were taken down from the wall this ended up in Harry's Backpack. He has kept it all this time but decided to give it to us before he left for college. We think it speaks for itself. (if you have trouble reading it, click on the picture to enlarge it)

August 14, 2010



I just added this angel to my bird bath , in honor of Spencer. It is something else to remind me of him. There are memories everywhere....this just adds to those. RIP Spencer. I know you are. Save a place for all of us.....OK?

Love from Mimi

August 14, 2010



Today marked another year without you and it just never gets any easier. We still miss you so much. You are so special to us. Normally on your birthday we go to Shogun's to eat but today in your honor Nannie and Papaw went there to eat tonight. Nannie still sees those beautiful blue eyes in everything she does, and You are still Papaw's Hero. We love and Miss you!

Nannie & Papaw Taylor

March 22, 2010



Hey Spencer. It's been awhile. The band is running relay for life for you. We'd be graduating together this year. I'm sorry you never had the chance...but you accomplished so much for such a short life. I know you were grateful for everything...which is why you didn't deserve your fate. But you taught everybody a life lesson, if that's any comfort. I'll never forget sitting next to you in English. Thank you for all the great conversations.

Sara



February 28, 2010



A few weeks ago the band was told what happened to a Boyd band student. They sat in silence for a few minutes for everyone to think and remember what it is like to go through losing a band member. When they started playing the first song they played was Ave Maria. I immediately thought about Spencer and the short time I knew him, such a great kid.

Megan

October 30, 2009



This is a story shared with Rhonda by Mr. Harkey, Spencer & Zachary's band director. During UIL Marching Contest (the band's most important marching contest), the band was assigned a warm up area in the parking lot prior to their performance. Shortly after the band began warming up, the Plano West Marching Band showed up in the adjacent warm up area. As Plano West began warming up the first thing they started playing was Ave Maria. There was no particular reason for them to be warming up with that song, it wasn't part of their show, it was just the song they decided to warm up with. Mr. Harkey said as soon heard the first couple of notes he nearly lost it and broke up. He said it took him a little while to get it together a little and said that if anyone had seen him entering the stadium shortly after that they would have thought that this director sure does get emotional for these contests. You see, Ave Maria was the song that the band played at Spencer's Funeral and it was also a part of the band's marching show for that entire season that was dedicated to Spencer. Mr. Harkey said that hearing that song was how he knew that Spencer was still with us.

It is great for us to hear that people still remember how Spencer touched their lives.

Memory from Alan Harkey

September 28, 2009



Happy Birthday Spencer

Love,

Papaw

September 28, 2009



Today is Spencer's 18th birthday, and although Nannie is in Houston I am not able to go eat at Shogun's which is your favorite place. I did go shopping today at the Katy Mills Mall and in there I was reminded of the time we were on our cruise to Italy and I saw they have a Johnny Rockets cafe. I did not eat your favorite chicken sandwich but I did enjoy the burger I had and had the best memories of you and our trip together. That was such a fun time on our trip eating at Johnny Rockets wih you and Zack on the cruise ship. Happy Birthday Sweetheart!

With all my Love Forever,

Nannie

August 13, 2009



Spencer,

Look at how much time has passed and yet it seems like only yesterday. I wish you could ask me the question you asked me two years ago. I would love to tell you all the wonderful things going on in my life but I still feel like you are the mastermind behind all of this. Thank you for whatever you did and are still doing, thank you for opening my eyes to a wonderful world that my heart couldn’t see. I would say that I wish you were here but I know you are and I feel you around me all the time. I have been wanting to tell this story for over a month and I think today is the day. July 3rd we were in New Mexico and went to a church called Chimayo in Rio Arriba it was beautiful and it was said to have healing powers in the soil, we went to see and sat in the Chapel for a while and admired the paintings and wood work. Every time I enter a church now it is hard to not think of our trip to Italy and the many churches we saw, but every once in a while I get a special feeling about one. We exited through a side door called “the room of souls” people tend to leave things there mementos, pictures, poems, etc. As I looked along the wall I noticed something, a lot of something’s. They were crutches, they lined the wall, I am sure to symbolize that someone did not need them anymore. And then I saw them, there was a pair of wooden ones. Alone among many metal ones. It hit me like a ton of bricks like you were there with me as I sat on the pew. I felt sad, happy, alone, and together with you all at the same time. I miss you, thank you for reminding me you are with me and letting me know you are there. everywhere. My goal today is to eat pizza, and make it through. That is all I expect from myself today and I am comfortable with that.

All my love,

Aunt Stef

May 12, 2009

This is a story written on the day of Spencer's funeral that one of the applicants to the Spencer Taylor Memorial Scholarship used for her McKinney Education Foundation scholarship application.

When the pressures of school, marching band, National Honor Society, and college applications begin to overwhelm, it is easy to get tunnel vision and become caught up with the unimportant details of life. I learned this hard lesson first hand. I became stressed in my attempt to juggle more than I could handle and stopped reaching out to the people around me. It wasn't long before I lost my balance and my perspective of life. Ironically, it was one young boy that I never took the time to get to know that changed my life and taught me a very important lesson.

When Spencer entered the band program, he looked like all the other kids. He seemed to be just like every other freshman that year and was not anybody that I needed to take the time out of my busy schedule to get to know (or so I thought). However, Spencer was anything but ordinary. After being diagnosed with cancer at a very young age, he grew up with a very different life than that of most teenagers. He missed school often for chemotherapy treatments and walked with crutches because of the damage done to his leg by multiple malignant tumors.

Although Spencer was forced to cope with many setbacks and hardships, he never let the smile fade from his determined face. When the tumors in his leg prevented him from marching on the field with his trombone, he did not throw in the towel. Instead, Spencer joined the drum line and was the first to memorize his music learned while playing in the stationary pit. As soon as our daily practice would end, Spencer would hobble on his crutches to the front of the mob trying to get to the air conditioned school to hold the door open for everyone carrying large instruments. He never even seemed bothered by the many kids who would rush past him who never took the time to utter a simple, "Thank-you."

During Spencer's final weeks, he never gave up. He still came to practices when he didn’t have Doctor appointments and continued to plunk away on his xylophone, never complaining about the battle waging inside of his body. Because he always had a bright smile on his face and a funny joke to tell a captive audience, nobody realized how truly sick he was. Even when I heard that his condition was worsening, I always believed that he would find a way to pull through. He was too young and loved life too much to succumb to this horrible disease.

On August 13,2007, at the young age of 15, Spencer lost his battle with cancer. When I heard the news, it seemed surreal. It not only was a life taken away too soon, but I had never taken the time to know him. Although given many opportunities over that year, I had been too absorbed with my own miniscule problems to take the time to reach out for his friendship.

A few days later, I went to a candle light memorial in Spencer's honor. At the memorial, nearly one hundred kids stood together, huddled under the bright moonlight to tell their favorite "Spencer Stories." Although I didn’t have any stories to contribute, I listened intently, trying to get to know the young boy that I had previously brushed aside. Some of the stories were sad, while others were hilariously funny, yet each managed to capture Spencer's enthusiasm for life.

Over the past year, the pain has healed and I am left with a newfound appreciation for life. My own problems seem trivial in comparison to the hardships other people face, especially to those of one young boy who never let his smile fade, even as his condition worsened.

I am happy to say that Spencer has changed my life for the better. He didn't simply disappear into the recesses of my heart like a faded memory, instead, he taught me to get to know everyone around me, never knowing who would change my life for the better. He has become my inspiration to go through life with a smile on my face and an optimistic attitude for everything I set out to achieve. And although I missed the opportunity to know Spencer in life, his death has forever changed my life by opening my eyes to appreciate the wonderful world around.

Nikki Cassidy

May 5, 2009

I have a picture of you on my mirror behind my sink at home that I see every morning and a frame of pictures at my workstation that I see every workday. I rely on those pictures for strength and encouragement everyday. You are more than a memory, because the gift of your perspective lives in me everyday. I am sorry when I fall short and get down or frustrated, I never saw that in you. Thanks again for the gift of your friendship. Just like I used to say when you would leave the clinic sometimes " I love you Spence "

"Fly Spencer Fly,

Mark Linane



March 8, 2009


Yes Mimi, I find myself constantly grieving for our Spencer. I am reminded of him in many conversations, actions and quirky little smiles. I recall a time when our children were living in Oklahoma and we went to visit them. Papaw and I were in the kitchen with Spencer and we were looking at a book. The picture was of an Eagle. Papaw made a comment about his feet. Our Spencer said, "Actually Papaw, those are talons." Every time I hear the word "Actually" I see his face. It brings a smile to my face and then the tears flow. I listen to the words in the song, "Homesick" by MercyMe and I know he is in a better place and how many times have I heard that but my heart is still hurting everyday. He is still with us as I feel his presence many times. I can never forget those beautiful blue eyes and that precious smile.

Forever his Nannie

Feb 15, 2009


Does anybody else out there catch yourself grieving all over again for Spencer? I wasn't even thinking about him ,then all of a sudden the tho't of him flooded my mind. I went to the site and started reading some of the comments and it is as if I had never read them before.....I know I have but it is like the first time I have read them. Maybe this is the way the grieving process works. Maybe a person's mind can only absorb so much and then it sort of ceases to comprehend anything else at that point...sort of shuts down. We probably couldn't deal with everything all at one time and maybe that is why people grieve in different ways at different times and different amounts of time. I know that Spencer and Shelby (Papaw) are in a place that is so totally awesome. If we could somehow see where they are, I think we would be so happy for them....I think we would be so happy for them ,that we would forgot about our loneliness for them. I know that isn't possible right now but I know that some day we WILL be able to know where they have gone before us. I look forward to that day when we can see them again. I never understood what people meant about having memories of your loved one...until now......they are continually with you and no one can take them away. There are so many of them and things come to mind that you have forgotten......some of them make you laugh and some of them make you cry. They are forever embedded in your mind, never to be removed. Some day we can talk about it to them, but for now they are living in a different realm, a higher realm, than we are, and I really am happy for them but I am still really missing them here.

Forever in my heart and mind.

Mimi

Nov 7, 2008


I know you like OSU Spencer, but no cheating this Sat., remember your friend Rylan #74 is playing for Tech.

Mark Linane

Aug 28, 2008


Dear Mr. and Mrs. Taylor,

First let me introduce myself. My name is Lukresa Dardy. I am a new band parent. My son D'Marcus Lee is in the 10th grade at MNHS.

Now with that said, I am going to share with you how your son and your family have touched my heart in an unexplainable and profound way.......

As I just stated, I am a new band parent for the 2008-2009 school year. That means that I did not have the privilege to meet your son Spencer. However, I have found myself today sitting at my desk (at work) crying my eyes out like he and/or your family are close friends of mine. I know you may think that this is weird, but let me explain how I came to this point.....

I opened an email from Mr. Harkey this morning to find out that I need to pay for my son's band meals that I knew nothing about. My first thought was "Great! More fees! :( " I was so annoyed, because my family is on a really tight budget right now and "surprise bills” or fees due seem to be the theme for us this month. Then I thought about how excited my son was when he told me he was going to be in the marching band. Of course, that means that I am going to pay the fee no matter what! ;)

My next thought was to go to the website and try to order some spirit items (yard sign, t-shirt, etc.) While on the MNHS Band website I started looking at pictures from last year thinking I can't wait to get pictures like these of my son and our family as we participate in his band events this year! While exploring the website I came across the page that started out "In Loving Memory"...... As I read the article, I remembered seeing you (Mr. and Mrs. Taylor) at the parent meeting last week. I remember you mentioning your son and the scholarship fund. When Mrs. Taylor stood up and spoke last week I could hear the strength in her voice as she fought back the tears. Even then I was touched by your courage. Honestly, I didn't give it anymore thought until today when I saw the pictures of Spencer.

From the MNHS website I went to your family’s website and read ALL the memories that were posted there as I listened to Spencer’s playlist with a lot of my personal favorite songs on it! I started crying and I just couldn't stop! Maybe I am crying because I am WAY too emotional, which may also be the case. But, I was thinking how hard it would be for me if it were one of my sons.

Then it dawned on me that I had actually sort of met Mrs. Taylor at the lake a few weeks ago. She was taking pictures of the kids and stuff. Then she came over and spoke to me and told me how cute she thought my youngest son is (Christian). Then she asked if she could hold him and I said sure. I was thinking...."Christian is not going to go with this lady!" He is usually rude to strangers. :) Then without hesitation Christian went to you (Mrs. Taylor)! I was so surprised! I told my husband, "I can't believe he went to her?" I looked over and he was playing and talking to you like he had known you his whole 19mths of life! :) Then, later you asked to take a picture of me, my husband, and Christian standing by the water. I didn't want to take the picture because I wasn't looking my best. You know, a woman thing! hehehe! :) But, when you told us that we were a beautiful family I was like o.k. what the heck! :)

I hope that you will send me the pictures you took, so I can have them to remember that day forever!

Anyway, I just wanted you guys to know how your family has really touched my heart today! I am just mesmerized by your strength! After reading all the memories of Spencer, I really wish I would have had a chance to meet him. He seems like he was such a blessing to everyone that came in contact with him. I feel just a little bit closer to GOD today just by reading about him and I thank you and Spencer for that! :)

It also sparked tears when I read the memory of Mrs. Taylor and Spencer seeing the angels.... My boys use to play and talk to themselves all the time when they were little and I use to tell people that they were playing with the angels. I have always believed this and your story pretty much confirmed it!

You do not have to post this (unless you really want to) because I know it's pretty long. :)

Sorry about that, but I was trying to share my spiritual experience that your family has created today. :)


God Bless and stay encouraged!

Lukresa Dardy
MNHS Band Parent (D'Marcus Lee)

Aug 13, 2008


As I woke up everyday this week I had you on my mind. With the one year anniversary of your passing it is still so vivid in my mind, the events of that day. I remember every word of the conversations of that day as well. I was in disbelief when the social worker called and said that you were in your final hours of life.

Later when I called your Dad he said that they did not understand what happened but that you were back and explained to us that you were sitting up and talking and asking questions and that your friends and other family members were there visiting with you. I was elated but frightened and confused as to what was going on.

I have so many times tried to interpret what happened. You owned the day. You were granted those hours to speak to all whom you loved and those who loved you so dearly. Those heartstrings still tug on me and not ONE single day has gone by that I have not thought of you.

I go back to those days we spent together on our cruise to Italy. How handsome you and your brother looked in your suits and ties. How I enjoyed you sitting beside your Nannie at our evening meal and what fun we shared at Johnny Rockets. I will never forget how we ran to keep up with you - and you on your crutches! And the smile that was on your face when you were the guest of honor at the ice skating show down on the ice on your throne. ha!

The day we went to the Vatican at the Pietà, where Mary was holding Jesus. It was there that I prayed to God to take my life and spare you yours. I love you that much. It had to be the Holiest place I have ever been and I felt this aura all around us.

As many do in these times, I had lost faith in God. I could not understand how he could let this happen to you. How he had shared his Son for 30 years and we were robbed at only 15 years with you. Through your conversations on that day with your Mother, when you were in that "other place" before you came back that afternoon, you Spencer showed me that there is truly that "better place" that so many have said you are in. You restored my faith in the Lord, but I still would have taken your place had God allowed me to do so.

I felt that the next day when Papaw and I reached the hospital that we would get to see you and I wanted to tell you something else. I never got to have that conversation with you and yet I will live to regret that. I'm sure that you know what it is, as I tell you everyday.

Always and Forever,



Your Nannie Taylor

August 13, 2008

That SMILE -- it could light up a room. My fondest Memory of Spencer is the smile on his face despite the pain he went through in PT. Every now and then Spencer might whisper, "that hurts a little bit", but he was still smiling. Rachel and I in PT wanted to do something in honor of Spencer, so yesterday we donated our hair to Locks of Love. Hopefully this will help a child in need and put a smile on their face like Spencers. Today is painful for all of us, but I know he is watching over all of us with that beautiful smile that I remember. We think of Spencer, Rhonda, Gary, and Zachary often.

We love you!

Lesley













August 10, 2008

One Year

Well, as the day draws nearer, it is becoming increasingly more difficult. Everything I see or hear seems to bring up some memory, new emotion, or some regret. It seems I am being bombarded with things he won't have the opportunity to do. He won't get to go to see the new batman movie with his friends, which he would have loved. Almost everywhere I go and everything I see, my first thought is he would have loved that, or it sucks that he won't get to do that. Late at night I can't get out of my head things that we didn't talk about. Nothing of real importance, I just wonder about whether I spent enough time just talking to him near the end.